Whither Marriage

Link for this video intereview and discussion can be viewed here.

I am not sure statistically how true this whole thing is anyways. So many people are opting out of getting that piece of paper (marriage certificate), and are living together, having a family and contributing to society just as a married couple would do. This has become an acceptable lifestyle to our society. Then you can look on the flip side. There are many couples that suffer from not being able to get pregnant. They spend thousands of dollars on fertility treatments even with the likelihood of lower percentage rates of success. That says a lot to me, especially for a society so focused on the almighty dollar. If people are going that extra mile for a baby then that has to be acknowledged. It’s a sad thing and quite a disappointment for many couples. There are also many unwanted children out there who are being adopted by couples and by single women and men. There is no definite answer to these phenomena.

Observation and thinking twice

Chastising women for not getting married and procreating is an unfair judgement. It's offending really. Great that Barbara met a supportive man and things turned out nicely for her, but the reality of it all is that it doesn’t turn out so rosy for many women out there. Saying that women are selfish for not marrying and procreating is wrong. Have you ever heard the saying, “don’t judge another person until you walked in their shoes”? In other words, you can’t say here is a pair of shoes, same size and colour for all. That is definitely not going to work for everyone because we are so individual and unique. Let's not forget that fact that it takes two to tango and I never heard any mention of the men who make choices to remain single and live life to the fullest. To me, it is sounding more and more like a double standard.

Women realize they don’t have to settle anymore just for marriage sake. Many before us have settled and made misery for not only themselves but also their partners and their children. Finding the right person is not an easy thing in this world. True courting has gone away and has been replaced with more of a fantasy cyber world. People meet on chat lines, communicate through email, SMS and phone conversations have become rare. We may have desensitized ourselves of the real contact and communicating. Making a solid connection with another is not easy in this generation. Do many of us really know what this really feels like anyways?

In this particular interview Barbara seems to be branding single women with a focus on selfishness and dishonour for being single for whatever reason there may be. If single women are such a disappointment to society, should they apologize for not getting married and having children before now? Unfortunately, many have never found a situation that led them on this path. I'm sure many of these women wish they would have met a suitable mate and gone on to have a family. Instead many continue to think positive and look for that right person and opportunity while they give back to their community by volunteering their time, working and paying their bills. My impression here is that single women are not as worthy as the women who has married and become a mother. There are too many situations and scenarios out there to even begin to think this way.